In our world, being a new parent is spoken of as if the main ingredient is joy, but this glosses over the complexity of what people feel when they have a new baby. Primary caregivers can feel overwhelmed, sad, and isolated from the lives they used to lead—and on top of that, guilty for feeling these things. Secondary caregivers may feel helpless or minimized in their new family dynamic, and at a loss for how to engage with their babies.

While all parents can feel scared, alone, and uncertain, at times, it becomes much harder to talk about the desperation that moms and dads feel when they’re sure that no one else feels as bad as they do, or could possible understand. But these experiences are actually not so uncommon. And therapy can really help.

We can start with a phone call and an understanding that even coming out to a session can feel like too much. We can discuss beginning with in-home sessions as a way of taking agency and control over something that has felt completely overwhelming and frightening.